Language and the body: Why words aren’t random
Most of us think of language as just… words. A convenient string of syllables we use to make sense of life. But language is more than just words; it’s anything that carries meaning — eye movements, the way we sigh and breathe, even interpretive dance if that’s your thing!
This post grew out of a lively radio conversation about mind–body language. Click here if you prefer to listen.
In this post, let’s zoom in on a particular type of language. What I call mind-body language — the words we use that aren’t random, but often mirror what’s happening inside our bodies. And they don’t just describe those sensations, they help shape them too.
Every time you say “I’m stuck,” “That’s a pain in the neck,” or “I can’t stomach it,” you’re giving away more than you realise.
The gut: processing life (and courage vs. cowardice)
Let’s start with the gut, because if you’ve ever said “I can’t stomach it”, “That makes me sick to my stomach,” or “It feels like a kick in the guts” you already know how closely language and digestion are linked.
Your gut’s main job is processing. Not just food, but experience. When you say you “can’t digest what happened,” you’re describing a genuine block in processing — mentally and physically. And your body often obliges by tightening, churning, or lurching in sympathy.
Scientists sometimes compare the gut to a simple sea slug — an organism that does little more than move toward nourishment and away from danger. Our gut does much the same. If we’re hungry, it draws us forward; if we’re terrified, the gut lets go — sometimes dramatically. (“Scared s***less” isn’t just a colourful phrase!)
We also talk about ‘having guts’ when we’re brave — another sign that the gut isn’t just about digestion but also about courage.
These gut-related phrases are classic mind-body language, showing how we struggle to process experiences as well as food.
And they aren’t just metaphors. Science describes the gut as an adaptive neural network — essentially, “another brain.” It processes information, makes decisions, and communicates constantly with the head brain. Ignore it, and you ignore one of your most powerful sources of wisdom — intuition.
I had a client who needed to tackle a project but said it felt “overpowering” — and that it was “getting on top of him.” He hadn’t even started, because his language had already told his body it was trapped and the task was bigger than him.
The heart: Passion, connection, and a vortex of magnetism
That’s right — your heart isn’t just a pump. It behaves more like a vortex, generating a measurable electromagnetic field. And while the heart has only about 120,000 neurons of its own (compared to the head brain’s 86 billion), its real superpower is this field: it radiates up to three metres — around nine feet — beyond your body. Which explains why, when you walk into a room and instantly “pick up a vibe,” you’re not imagining it. You’re literally sensing the energy in that space.
When people say, “My heart’s not in it anymore,” they’re describing a loss of passion. And when someone “wears their heart on their sleeve,” we know instantly they’re emotional, open, maybe a bit vulnerable.
On the flip side, when we say someone ‘has a big heart,’ we instantly know they’re generous and compassionate.
That’s because the heart is about compassion, relating, emotions, and values. It’s literally wired to feel.
There are even cases of heart transplant recipients taking on quirks of their donors. For example, Claire Sylvia, a dancer, developed a craving for chicken McNuggets and beer after receiving the heart of a motorcyclist who — you guessed it — loved chicken McNuggets and beer. He even had some in his pocket when he died. She tells the story in her memoir “A Change of Heart.” (This is an affiliate link. If you click and purchase,
I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you.)
Her tastes (and temperament) shifted in ways that baffled her, but made sense if we consider the heart as another brain with memories of its own.
The trouble is, in modern society we often elevate intellect above all else. Head over heart. Logic over feeling. Yet the heart brain communicates in its own way — not with long sentences but with a quiet nudge or a whisper. The head often barges in to “translate” what it thinks the heart means. Which is why so many of us have forgotten how to listen to the subtler signals — until they show up as heart problems or emotional shutdown.
These expressions grow out of real physical and emotional experience. It’s another reminder that mind-body language is grounded in physiology.
The bladder: Pressure, release, and why you’re “pissed off”
We don’t usually think of the bladder as metaphorical — yet listen to the language we use when emotions build up: “I’m pissed off.” “I can’t let it go.” “I’m bursting with emotion.”
These phrases are all about pressure and release. The bladder holds, then lets go. And when we cling to resentment or old grudges, our language mirrors the same act: “I just can’t let it go.”
And of course, being able to ‘let it go’ is one of the healthiest things we can do — both emotionally and physically.
On the radio, Aaron challenged me: “Surely not everyone who’s pissed off ends up with bladder issues?” Fair point — but the thing is, if you keep using that phrase, day after day, your body listens. Over time, what we say starts to direct what we feel — and what we physically experience.
It works both ways: the body affects the words, and the words affect the body. Which is why paying attention to the way you describe your frustrations can be the first step in actually releasing them — instead of bottling them up.
Breathing & space: Survival and freedom
Breath is life. Miss a meal and you’ll be fine for a day. Miss a night’s sleep and you’ll be cranky, but you’ll cope. Stop breathing and you’ve got minutes. No wonder our language about space and survival so often comes back to the lungs.
Think of phrases like:
“I can’t breathe in this situation.”
“That took my breath away.”
“This job feels suffocating.”
These phrases aren’t casual throwaways. They reflect exactly how trapped or expansive we feel. Say something is “suffocating,” and your body obliges with shallow breaths, a tight chest, and hunched posture.
But then there are those breathtaking moments — when a view, a piece of music, or falling in love literally makes you expand.
Here’s where it gets interesting: the metaphors we use can shape the way we feel. I once asked someone who felt their breathing was “blocked” what kind of block it was. They said, “a brick wall.” Well, no wonder they couldn’t breathe! But what if that block were a curtain instead — something you could sweep aside? Suddenly their body relaxed. Their breath deepened. The change in metaphor shifted their physiology.
It’s a reminder that sometimes we’re creating the restriction ourselves, unconsciously. And with a tiny tweak in words, we can dissolve the brick wall and pull the curtain aside.
Bones, muscles & support: Carrying the world
We talk about responsibility in physical terms: “It’s a pain in the neck.” “I can’t shoulder that.” “This job is back-breaking.” “I’m carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders.”
These aren’t just colourful expressions, but more mind-body language. Our posture reflects the load we believe we’re carrying. Shoulders hunch. Backs ache. People literally look as if they’re hauling around invisible burdens.
We also talk about having a ‘backbone’ when someone shows strength, or ‘standing tall’ when they’re proud of themselves.
If these phrases were just random metaphors, why would so many of them involve the very body parts that tense up under stress? Neck, shoulders, spine, back — the exact areas that stiffen when pressure mounts. Our words and our bodies are dancing to the same tune.
Identity: The danger of “I Am”
Of all the phrases we use, none carry more weight than the ones that begin with “I am.” Whatever follows isn’t just a description — it’s a statement of identity — of who you are.
So when someone says, “I’m such a failure,” they’re not criticising a single action. They’re branding themselves. Over time, those words sink in, shaping unconscious beliefs and filtering how we see the world.
There’s a simple shift that makes all the difference: keep criticism at the level of behaviour, not identity. “That was a mistake” is very different from “I’m a failure.” One gives you room to learn and adapt; the other shuts the door.
Equally, saying ‘I am resilient’ or ‘I am learning’ reinforces a strong and flexible identity.
Nothing demonstrates the impact of mind-body language more clearly than the words we use after ‘I am…’” because the more often we repeat them, the truer they become.
Language isn’t random
If there’s one thing to take away, it’s this: your mind-body language isn’t random — it’s the script you’re giving your body. Every “pain in the neck,” every “I’m stuck,” every “I’m drained” is more than a throwaway phrase. It’s your brain’s shorthand for what your body is feeling — and often, what your body starts to create.
“Every word you use weighs you down or lifts you up.” ~ Stephanie Philp
The good news? Change the words, and you change the experience. “I’m drained” becomes “I’m recharging.” “I’m suffocating” becomes “I want more space.” Small shifts in language can unlock big shifts in how you feel.
So the next time you catch yourself saying something that makes your shoulders hunch or your stomach churn — pause. Ask: “If I changed the words, how would my body respond?”
Because mind-body language isn’t just how we describe life. It’s how we script it. Once you start noticing mind-body language, you’ll hear it everywhere — in conversations, in your own self-talk, even in the way your body responds to everyday stress.
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